http://Zuzia.tigblog.org/ What's on the minds of young leaders from around the globe? en-us http://Zuzia.tigblog.org/post/172061
I need to be reminded about this constantly. Seeing the film "Frontiers of Dreams and Fears" made me realize this. Thank you for allowing me to see this film and be reminded about others' stories. I think the longer I am at SIT, I realize that I still want to see more of the world. Yes, I am meeting people, listening to stories about their countries. Instead of having all of my questions answered, and my curiosity finished, I still realize that there is so much that I need to learn, see, and experience.

However, what I am most thankful for is that I can now connect a country, circumstance, to another person and his/her story. Stories and peoples' lives are what keeps me going. It has made my life and experience immensely richer and I hope to continue learning throughout my life.

Thank you for the gift and realization.]]> Sat, 24 Mar 2007 08:03:00 EDT http://Zuzia.tigblog.org/post/172061 36.3213889 127.419722236.3213889127.4197222 http://Zuzia.tigblog.org/post/167889
*I will never sacrifice my soul, energy, emotions, and everything to a person who does not love, like, or respect me
*Referring to the above statement, I want to maintain my integrity in all relationships
*I need to learn how to take things less seriously and less personally, just in general, as well in relationships
*I want to travel around the world, and visit/live/teach/work/learn in as many countries as I can (This can be accomplished by joining the Peace Corps, Peace Boat, and other related activities if necessary!)
*I want to be the best teacher I can be to my students, and learn how to advocate for them and their rights. This can take place either in public schools in America and/or abroad as well.
*I want to live/work/study in NYC or DC at some point (enough said!)
*I want to continue my higher education and either receive a PhD or Ed.D someday
*I want to have at least one fulfilling, satisfying, honest, beautiful relationship with one man at some point in my life
*I want to operate educational programs that promote peace and intercultural understanding among young people and children (Perhaps be like Oprah and open schools--as well as end the public school crisis as well)

Will I be able to accomplish all of these goals? It remains to be seen.]]> Sat, 10 Mar 2007 10:03:00 EST http://Zuzia.tigblog.org/post/167889 36.3213889 127.419722236.3213889127.4197222 http://Zuzia.tigblog.org/post/167891 Well, I am back at SIT and it is very surreal to be here. I left it in such a negative state of mind with low morale. I was almost scared to come back here. But, after talking with one of my roommates, I am starting to feel better to be back here. Even though I sometimes wonder if SIT/teaching is right for me, I am going to try to make the rest of my time at SIT the best experience for me. I am going to try to start this semester with a clean slate and forget all of the negativity that I experience.

However, there is so much to do in such little time. I have to start asking for letters of recommendation for summer teaching jobs, including for one application that is due next week! Plus, I am starting my teaching practicum in two days, which is scaring and exciting at the same time. Below are some more thoughts and expectations that I want for this semester:

From my teaching practicum: I want to learn from my mentor teacher
-What should Kindergardners learn by the end of the school year, especially related to linguistic abilties?
-How do you integrate ELLs into the mainstream classroom? Do you have to provide lots of scaffolding? Make them work with other instructors? Students?
-Relationship with the ELL coordinator
-How do you communicate with parents, community, other teachers regarding ELL students?
-Classroom management-How do you create activities that are stimulating for these children and make them engaged?

From the ELL coordinator:
-Advocacy, Advocacy, Advocacy!
-Issues related to ESL in the public schools
-Relationship with students, teachers, parents, and community
-Techniques that are beneficial for the students

From SIT:
-More practical experience
-Want to hear and learn more from others, including my fellow peers
-Issues of diversity/ESL in education
-Outside speakers and other opportunities

I hope that most of my wants/needs will come to fruition. We'll just wait and see...]]> Tue, 02 Jan 2007 09:01:00 EST http://Zuzia.tigblog.org/post/167891 36.3213889 127.419722236.3213889127.4197222 http://Zuzia.tigblog.org/post/167893 2006 Year in Review

January-Still in Poland, visiting friends and family. Flight back to Ohio was rather interesting because my mother unfortunately sprained her ankle the last day we were there, while we were visiting my grandfather's grave. Once I returned to Poland, I found out that I was accepted to MIIS' TESOL program. Was interviewed by one of the faculty members of SIT. For awhile, I was not sure if I was going to be accepted or not by SIT, but eventually, received the great news. Started tutoring ESL adult students at a local Adult Education Center.

February-Lots of job applications for summer jobs; thought I was going to teach in Chicago over the summer, but it didn't work out.

March-Visited SIT; fell in love with the campus; unconsciously made a decision to go there. Sent application for teaching internship position at Putney.

April-Visited MIIS; confirmed my decision to attend SIT.

May-Almost accepted summer teaching job at another adult education center, but was offered the Putney teaching position at the last minute. Decided to go to Putney because I wanted to work with teenagers and it was nearby SIT.

June/July-Started my teaching position at Putney. Experienced life at a boarding school, leading camping trips, coaching volleyball, teaching theater improvisation, and working with the wonderful PIE students. Dealt with homesick campers and attitude adjustments. Learned a lot about myself and my teaching capabilities; had a lot of teaching/leadership opportunities!

August-Went back home to Ohio for one month; my two friends from Poland were there and I showed them around Cleveland, Ohio, and Canada. Switched from Internationalist track to public school track @SIT because I want to work with young people.

September-Started my experience at SIT. Met the most amazing people there--former Peace Corps volunteers, human rights workers, leaders from other countries. Fell in love with my classes and my work. For the first time in a long time, I was happy to go to class. Tried things that I have never done before. Unforutunately, sprained my ankle, which took a while to recover. Despite that, September was the best month of the year!

October-Started PACE with my fellow peers, joined other organizations, such as Immigrant Rights Group. Started to feel overwhelmed with the task of public school teaching as we visited different public school sites--where should I teach? Should I only focus on poorer areas or should I be open to teach anywhere? I want to teach where I am needed and wanted, to help any student who needs my help. So much tension during that time.

November-Democrats took control! Became really ill during the beginning of the month; took awhile for me to recover. Missed local conference, even though I paid money for it. Went home for Thanksgiving. Reconnected with friends that I haven't talked to since the beginning of the semester. Found out my practicum placement--Fort River Elementary School, working with Kindergardeners!

December-Feelings of exhaustion and overwhelmed. Felt I am too idealistic for teaching and concerns if I can do it. Had a blast performing for my Spanish class. Controversy surrounding our program, as students are leaving and no one is explaining why. Relieved to go home to recharge my batteries and determined to face the new year with confidence.

2006 was a great, challenging year. I hope and I pray that I will have the necessary strength to get through 2007.

I am all packed--ready to return to Vermont to start the new year!]]> Sun, 31 Dec 2006 06:12:00 EST http://Zuzia.tigblog.org/post/167893 36.3213889 127.419722236.3213889127.4197222 http://Zuzia.tigblog.org/post/167895
Sometimes it seems that teaching is such an awesome, overwhelming responsibility...there are so many problems in the world, so many issues/traumas that my students will bring into the classroom. Can I address it? Can I help my students overcome those difficulties, to be the people I know they can be? Or will I become those stifling teachers that everyone hates? I hope and I pray that I won't be like those teachers, but I constantly worry that I will wake up one day and realize that I am a horrible teacher and I can't reach my students.

Only time can tell I suppose...]]> Fri, 29 Dec 2006 09:12:00 EST http://Zuzia.tigblog.org/post/167895 36.3213889 127.419722236.3213889127.4197222 http://Zuzia.tigblog.org/post/167897
On Christmas Day, we traveled to Canada to visit my relatives. It was great to see everyone there--for the first time in a long time, all of my cousins who are in the same age group as me were all there. It was nice to spend time together, sharing with each other what we're doing, as well as teasing each other. My family and I spent the night there and the next day, we visited Niagara Falls and had lunch at a nearby restaurant. Although I have had the privilege of visiting Niagara Falls since I was a young girl, I am still in awe whenever I visit the Falls. Such a majestic view of nature (yet currently surrounded by Casinos and other touristy gimmicks).

However, for me, one of the greatest things that happened on Christmas Day was playing the piano for one of my older cousins. She is more than 90 years old, but she has a great memory about everything. I played for her traditional Polish songs, which she and my mother sang with great spirit. Playing the piano made me realize how much I missed having music throughout my life, and it has also made me become even more homesick for Poland. There are plans for me to go there in the summer, but I wish that I was more proficient in the language and my communication abilities. Although my plans are to teach in US public schools for awhile, maybe I will return to Poland as a teacher again.

In a few days, I will be returning to Vermont. My teaching practicum starts soon, and I am excited and nervous about it as well. We'll see how it'll all work out. I hope that I can be the best teacher for my students. Trying to find teaching clothes have been challenging for me (especially regarding pants and the fact that I have gained weight since starting SIT), but luckily, I found some nice ones yesterday. I am keeping my fingers crossed that everything will work out for the upcoming new year.]]> Thu, 28 Dec 2006 07:12:00 EST http://Zuzia.tigblog.org/post/167897 36.3213889 127.419722236.3213889127.4197222 http://Zuzia.tigblog.org/post/167899 Christmas Eve is here and finally, another update on this blog. So much has happened since I last updated this blog. I successfully finished one semester at SIT and I really don't know how I should feel. On the one hand, I am happy there. I have met so many interesting people there--so many people there that I admire! On the other hand, I feel...I don't know how I feel. I worry constantly if I am too idealistic to be a teacher. My future students do not need another idealist preaching to them--they need someone to teach them, to guide them. I still worry that I cannot be an effective teacher, but once my practicum starts in a week, hopefully I will gain more of the necessary skills needed.

I am back home in Ohio again until the beginning of January. Today is Christmas Eve, a very special time with my family. It's the best time of the year, but also very stressful. I am sick of hearing all of the silly Christmas carols, but I love listening to the Polish Koledy! I feel happy, yet sad at the same time. It's hard to be happy to receive gifts when there is so much suffering in the world. Plus, every year, my mother is giving me more responsibilities (cooking, etc.) I know that I have to learn those skills, but I am still a horrible cook! I fear the day when my mother will turn to me and say, ok, it's your turn to prepare everything!

I shouldn't gripe about this, but I have gained weight since being at SIT. I need to cut back on all those yummy desserts and try to exercise more (Don't I remember waking up early in the morning and doing yoga and aerobics exercises? BLAH!). i am so busy, but I need to take care of myself, put my needs first in front of everyone. (Perhaps that's why my sister gave me a calendar entitled "For those women who are too busy for everything".

Tomorrow, off to Canada to spend Christmas Day with my relatives.

I need to work on updating this more often--talking about my experiences at SIT, but we'll see if my plans will work or not (similar to my experiences at Putney and in Poland--who has time to update when you are busy experiencing life?)

Happy Holidays! May there be peace in the world (and I truly mean it!)]]> Sun, 24 Dec 2006 07:12:00 EST http://Zuzia.tigblog.org/post/167899 36.3213889 127.419722236.3213889127.4197222 http://Zuzia.tigblog.org/post/167901
Every day, i feel like I have a greater sense of purpose. I know what I need to do and I have great colleagues and faculty who support me here. My greatest fear is how to maintain this sense of purpose once I leave SIT. Will I remain happy or will I grow discouraged? I really don't know.

I also just found out that I will be working at a local elementary school with a Kindergarden class. How sweet and fun!]]> Wed, 29 Nov 2006 11:11:00 EST http://Zuzia.tigblog.org/post/167901 36.3213889 127.419722236.3213889127.4197222 http://Zuzia.tigblog.org/post/167903
I don't think I have enough time and space to describe everything that I have done so far. I will definitely try to work on describing more my experiences in future blogs. If only I was more disciplined and write more about my experiences in a journal, it would help me out immensely.

Some highlights:
*Groups-PACE, Immigrant Rights
*Sprained my ankle, got sick
*Worked on Pragmatics
*Peer taught in French; studying Spanish
*Read an amazing book by Mel Levine: "management in profile"-really will make an impact on my teaching
*Wrote a cultural autobiography-really want to reexplore my cultural roots in-depth
*Still don't know where I will be doing my winter practicum; all I know it's somewhere in Massachusetts. Will it be at an elementary school or middle school?

Essential Questions:
1) How will I keep from burning out as a teacher?
2)How can I maintain my creativity and idealism as a teacher, when i am forced to teach content-based and to the test?
3)How can I implement social justice curriculum in the classroom and will not be called a "bleeding heart liberal" "PC", when I believe these values are essential for my students?

I am home in Ohio until Saturday. It's just so strange to be here...I think I am itching to go back to Vermont, even though I want to be with my family.]]> Thu, 23 Nov 2006 07:11:00 EST http://Zuzia.tigblog.org/post/167903 36.3213889 127.419722236.3213889127.4197222 http://Zuzia.tigblog.org/post/167905 *Studied Thai intensively for two weeks. It was one of the most frustrating things that I have experienced in such a long time, but the struggle was well worth it. I actually miss the class and I definitely need to keep it up before forgetting it.
*Learning how to become more flexible and patient towards myself. Trying to get used to living in a dorm and adjusting to everyone else's schedule.
*Discovered Capoeira and I love it! I am going to another class in a couple of minutes.
*Sprained my ankle which really tested my emotional limits. This reminds me that I have to take care of myself and even seek out help from others when I need it. I was also depressed for many days because I am so used to being physically active. I think it has finally healed, but I do need to keep an eye on it still.
*Visited a local elementary school which I loved--one of my possible considerations for practicum site
*Trying to integrate more arts in my life. Went to a puppet show on Saturday and I am planning to go to a concert next Saturday.

I think I am finally starting to settle down @ SIT. We'll see how long this feeling will last.]]> Wed, 27 Sep 2006 07:09:00 EDT http://Zuzia.tigblog.org/post/167905 36.3213889 127.419722236.3213889127.4197222 http://Zuzia.tigblog.org/post/167907
It's hard to believe that September 11th happened five years ago. I can vividly remember what happened. I was a freshman in college and I was waiting for my Chemistry class to begin when someone bursted into the classroom and said to turn on the radio because a plane crashed into the World Trade Center. At that time, I thought it was just a tiny Sessna plane...Little did I know how catastrophic the event would be.

I was only 18 at that time. It seems that this event has made a hige impact on the way I have lived my entire adult life. This event will probably still impact my life in many ways for the rest of my life.

As far as life at SIT, I am still making adjustments...study adjustments, work adjustments, roommate adjustments, interpersonal adjustments. Some things I think I am thriving with, while others are in room for improvement. It remains to be seen what will happen.]]> Wed, 13 Sep 2006 09:09:00 EDT http://Zuzia.tigblog.org/post/167907 36.3213889 127.419722236.3213889127.4197222 http://Zuzia.tigblog.org/post/167909
The problem started out in the beginning. I started walking too fast and proceeded to start multiple conversations at the same time. What I should have done was to start off slowly and then gradually set a reasonable pace for me.

The trail wasn't flat and straight. Instead, there were several inclines I had to climb. There were several moments where I felt like I was going to throw up and/or pass out (maybe because of altitude change), but luckily, I had the common sense to stop every now and then. I actually prayed several times for strength and courage to make it to the summit.

Once I got at the summit, the views were breathtaking! You could see Brattleboro everywhere and I could almost see SIT in the distance. It was well worth the struggle to get up to the top. Coming down was easier, but at one point, a man stopped me and commented to me about my shirt. I was wearing a "I Heart NY" t-shirt and this man was telling me about the time he saw a bumper sticker with the phrase "I Heart ME" and whether it meant the person loved Maine or him/herself. (Interesting conversations Vermonters have here!)

This hike reminded me of a Chinese fortune cookie I ate in Bennington, on the way to Brattleboro. The fortune proclaimed "Your path will be long and arduous, but infintely rewarding in the end." This analogy could be used to describe yesterday's hike and my year at SIT. The coursework sounds challenging, but I think my experience here will be so rewarding to me.

I hope...]]> Sun, 10 Sep 2006 03:09:00 EDT http://Zuzia.tigblog.org/post/167909 36.3213889 127.419722236.3213889127.4197222 http://Zuzia.tigblog.org/post/167911
So far...so good.

So much information has been given to us over the past few weeks. I am still trying to process everything at once. I love it here however! The students and faculty are amazing. They all had wonderful experiences (ex. Peace Corps, AmeriCorps, teaching abroad) and here I am, little ol' me, with not so much experience. It almost makes me question: "Should I be here? Why did they accept me?" But, I am going to try to make this the best experience that I can make.

Some highlights from the past week:
* I am currently living in a dorm on the edge of campus. Although it's a bit of a walk, it's like on the edge of being on and off campus. However, i think it will provide me the peace and tranquility that I need in order to study. Living with 4 other girls--so it's a small dorm. Similar to White Cottage @ Putney.
* Went contadancing again! Lots of fun!
* Coursework seems demanding, yet focused on my own learning. It almost seems liberating--like I am actually being required to think and express my own opinions!
* I saw the movie "The Motorcycle Diaries" and I love it! It's the story of Ernesto "Che" Guevara when he was younger, travelling from Argentina to Venezuela. More than that, it shows how travelling changes your outlook on life, especially for the better.
* Last night was a drumming workshop. So much fun! The musicians gave us drums and they showed us how to play different rhythms, such as African Dance, Samba, and Funk. They said that they come back to campus and offer drumming workshops, which is something I have to do!
*Today-hiking at Mt. Wantastiquet. (Unlike past hiking experiences, it looks like it won't rain!)

So, I'm having lots of fun! We'll see how long it will last!]]> Sat, 09 Sep 2006 12:09:00 EDT http://Zuzia.tigblog.org/post/167911 36.3213889 127.419722236.3213889127.4197222 http://Zuzia.tigblog.org/post/167913
I am not as nervous as I thought I was going to be. Perhaps the summer at Putney really helped me. I am stressed because I hate moving and I worry that I am bringing more stuff than I actually need. However, having people gushing how much they will miss me has made me feel embarassed and emotional as well. I just hope that I am making the right decision, but I know that right now, this feels so right for me.

I don't know when I will return to Ohio (perhaps November, perhaps December, but briefly), but despite my feelings and complaints against Ohio, there will be some things that I will miss:
*My family
*West Side Market
*Close proximity to the city (the closest "cities" in Vermont are about 3 hours away!)
*University Circle and the art museum/cinematheque
*Cleveland Heights/Cedar Lee Theatre
*Bob Evans in Mentor--fried chicken with honey mustard, baked potato with sour cream, salad with ranch dressing, rolls, and banana nut bread

Things I won't miss
*The obsession Clevelanders have over sports
*The dreary, depressing January weather (when it doesn't snow)
*Closed-mindedness, lack of progression, and overall conservative values outside of Cleveland (this may exist in Vermont, as well. I really don't know about that.)
*People who have known me since I was 5 years old and still think that I am 5 years old....Perhaps now is my time to shine!

Ok, next time I will be using the internet, I will be in Vermont!]]> Fri, 01 Sep 2006 04:09:00 EDT http://Zuzia.tigblog.org/post/167913 36.3213889 127.419722236.3213889127.4197222 http://Zuzia.tigblog.org/post/167915
Anyway, other things/thoughts that have appeared in my mind for the past few days:
-I have never fully realized how materialistic, rich, and lucky Americans are, until talking to my friends from Poland. Walking around a mall, looking at individuals leaving with bags filled with $100-200 clothes, now makes me sick inside. However, not as much as my friends from Poland, who know that they would never be able to afford these things, as much as they love their country and home. I feel bad showing them around, clearly outlining the social/economic differences between ourselves. Unfortunately, this is the reality of America: there are people who are able to afford these possessions, while there are others who barely survive. I have been trying to show them these differences (i.e. Cleveland vs. Beachwood and other rich suburbs) but it's hard to deny and forget the opulent homes, cars, and clothes that we pass by.
-Went to Niagara Falls on Saturday. Woke up extremely early, but had lots of fun getting wet on the "Maid on the Mist" boat tour. I love the fact that you can walk around Niagara Falls and see/hear languages and people from around the world. What I hate: the casinos. I remember what it was like many years ago without the casinos. Now, I think Niagara Falls is starting to lose its charm.
-Today: Off to the Rock n' Roll hall of fame and I have to start packing!]]> Mon, 28 Aug 2006 10:08:00 EDT http://Zuzia.tigblog.org/post/167915 36.3213889 127.419722236.3213889127.4197222 http://Zuzia.tigblog.org/post/167917
It was cool to walk around and see the cars and other artifacts that Henry Ford collected throughout his life. Also got a chance to see the Kennedy assassination car and the Reagan car (rather creepy to look at those cars to know that someone died (or nearly died) in them--the same as looking at the chair that Abraham Lincoln got assassinated in). Walked around and looked at cars, replicas of motels/RVs from 1950's, the time period where American taste was extremely tacky.

I was really impressed with one of the new exhibits at the Henry Ford museum. It was devoted to liberty, justice, and the struggles that people endured in order to fight for social justice (i.e. Civil Rights and women's rights). I had the chance to walk through the bus where Rosa Parks sat and didn't move. It was so awesome. Alas, it made me realize how much still needs to be accomplished until true equality will flourish in America.

We also visited the Ford Rouge plant as well. Annoying music was played throughout the tour. Made Henry Ford appear to be so much like a hero... (I admit that he was ingenious in creating ways to massively produce items, but not many people know about his eugenics/racist ideas. Again, the dominant ideology still persists. )More special effects (making a mudane job look more interesting than it is. I swear that if there are no special effects in museums, Americans will stay away and never learn anything. I hate those IMAX/OMNIMAX type of museums. As educators, we don't have access to special effects; no wonder children are bored in schools).

It was interesting to observe the workers at their various stations. I was struck with how many women were working at a typically, male-dominated field. I cannot imagine working down there. I would probably be fired within the first few hours. Imagine, your job is only to fasten a seatbelt into the truck, and that's what you do for 8-12 hour days. I also feel sad for them as well, especially with the projected cuts that Ford will be instituting within the next several weeks/months. What a hard life.]]> Thu, 24 Aug 2006 10:08:00 EDT http://Zuzia.tigblog.org/post/167917 36.3213889 127.419722236.3213889127.4197222 http://Zuzia.tigblog.org/post/167919
We went hiking on Little Mountain, a "mountain" located not too far from where I live. The forecasters have been predicting rain for the past several days, which came true. It was raining like cats and dogs by the time we arrived there. A local guide came and showed us around. However, we were concerned because he said that he gets lost in Little Mountain quite frequently. In many ways, I can understand. In Little Mountain, we were surrounded by trees and plants. Everywhere you turned everything looked the same.

Despite the rain, (and the fact that I fell into a ravine at one point!)everything looked beautiful. In the 1800's, hotels were built and the likes of wealthy Clevelanders, such as Rockefeller and James Garfield, came and spent the weekends there. However, there were no remnants of the hotels left. I could understand why people would come there--it was so peaceful. You couldn't hear anything or anyone there. No cars, no noise--makes you forget that you were in Ohio.

At several points, we climbed and trekked on (and through) large rocks. It's a good thing that I am not as claustrophobic as I think because there were some tight spots. The guide also showed us several caves, but I was too exhausted to go climbing through them. One of my friends did and he had a great time.

I truly miss the mountains in Vermont and in Poland. Although I am no means an outdoorsy as I like to believe, it's still nice to spend time in the wilderness. Makes you grateful to live underneath a warm shelter.]]> Mon, 21 Aug 2006 10:08:00 EDT http://Zuzia.tigblog.org/post/167919 36.3213889 127.419722236.3213889127.4197222 http://Zuzia.tigblog.org/post/167921 Sat, 12 Aug 2006 10:08:00 EDT http://Zuzia.tigblog.org/post/167921 36.3213889 127.419722236.3213889127.4197222 http://Zuzia.tigblog.org/post/167923 Sat, 05 Aug 2006 05:08:00 EDT http://Zuzia.tigblog.org/post/167923 36.3213889 127.419722236.3213889127.4197222 http://Zuzia.tigblog.org/post/167925 Thu, 03 Aug 2006 08:08:00 EDT http://Zuzia.tigblog.org/post/167925 36.3213889 127.419722236.3213889127.4197222 http://Zuzia.tigblog.org/post/167927 Wed, 02 Aug 2006 04:08:00 EDT http://Zuzia.tigblog.org/post/167927 36.3213889 127.419722236.3213889127.4197222 http://Zuzia.tigblog.org/post/167929 *I love the arts. I need to incorporate theater and music back into my life once again, even though i am planning to become a teacher.
*I love teaching and mentoring. I feel more comfortable about it now than I did even a month ago. However, there are still lots of things that I need to learn: when to intervene and how to create appropriate boundaries between myself and my students
*I need to find some way to get into the certification program at SIT. High school students may be obnoxious and hard to handle sometimes, but it's still a very rewarding experience.
*I ate way too much food and I need to get back to my diet/exercise plan as soon as I get back to Ohio. (Sounds extremely vain, but I can tell my body is suffering from it--I need to do yoga once again as well)
*I am not as outdoorsy or as athletic as I like to think (more about the Pinnacle trip and my volleyball experience later--I just need to find a way to become more physically active and not be lazy. Plus, I need to finally learn how to swim).
*I need to become more social. I am getting better, but like my teaching skills, there is room for improvement.
*I need to learn how to become emotionally strong. To not develop relationships where I will believe something wonderful will come out from it, but then reality sets in, and the relationship does not go anywhere. I need to stop developing unrealistic expectations about people and to accept that there are some things that I cannot change about myself and others.

We'll see how far it will take me when I return back to Ohio and start grad. school in the fall.]]> Mon, 31 Jul 2006 03:07:00 EDT http://Zuzia.tigblog.org/post/167929 36.3213889 127.419722236.3213889127.4197222 http://Zuzia.tigblog.org/post/167931
-Excited because it will be a new opportunity for me, I will gain teaching experience, I will be away from Ohio this summer, and I will be spending my summer in beautiful Vermont.
-Nervous because I don't know what to expect, what the students will be like, what my supervisor/lead teacher will be like, if I can compentently teach, control students, if I packed enough/too much, etc. I know that I will be fine in the end, but of course, I have to (always) worry.

We're leaving early in the morning, driving all the way to Albany, New York tomorrow, and then arriving in Vermont on Saturday. I don't start work until Sunday.

This may be my last blog post for awhile. i will try to keep updating my blog periodically throughout the summer.

Until then, TTFN-Ta ta for now!

***********************************************************************************
Oh, Polish football team! First losing miserably to Ecuador, then the heart-breaking game yesterday against Germany.

We were so close until the last minute! Alas, there is the next World Cup four years from now!]]> Thu, 15 Jun 2006 08:06:00 EDT http://Zuzia.tigblog.org/post/167931 36.3213889 127.419722236.3213889127.4197222 http://Zuzia.tigblog.org/post/167933
Now, I have lost the weight and people have been acting either jealous, strange, too enthusiastic for me. Some start complaining how fat they are in front of me and comparing themselves to me. Some indirectly start feeding me more food, acting "worried" that I have lost so much weight (this was so true for me in Poland--fattening me up, yet admonishing me that I have gained weight). One person has told me that I look rather "dainty" lately. Another person told me that "you look great, you've lost so much weight--not that you looked bad before or anything".

I know that I am healthy. My doctor has told me so. And I trust him. He told me that I am in a healthy weight range for someone my height and body weight. It makes me feel better, knowing that I am in an ideal weight range. (I only plan on losing 5-10 more pounds anyway). However, these comments just bother me and some people get testy with me. They expect me to have a solution that would work for them.

It gets worse in terms of dating. Some men are starting to look at me as an attractive person, and it makes me feel good. But, my lingering doubts makes me question if they would feel the same way when I was heavier. I am still the same person underneath my skin, albeit with more confidence and more patience with myself. Can others see the same thing as I do? It makes me feel sick that looks still matter in this superficial world.]]> Mon, 12 Jun 2006 04:06:00 EDT http://Zuzia.tigblog.org/post/167933 36.3213889 127.419722236.3213889127.4197222 http://Zuzia.tigblog.org/post/167935
Well, yesterday, was the much hyped and over-anticipated garage sale. It was an interesting experience, I don't know if I would ever do something like this again. It was just so funny thinking that we would be able to earn so much money from this experience. It was also funny believing that we had to "outdo" our neighbors, looking at them as competitors instead of as people who want to give up their junk to other people.

At first, people showed up early, but they bought something. The most heaviest traffic was early in the morning, where people spent their time brousing for goodies. I know that I am not a born saleswoman, but it was frustrating the first few hours. Trying to convince people to buy my junk was an ardous task. They either were looking for something specific or they were just extremely picky. It's hard for people to look at something that you once loved and treasured and viewed it as junk themselves. In fact, some people were just downright stingy. We priced one item as $2.50 and one woman would only pay 50 cents for it. I am open to bartering, but there are some items that should not be lowered at all. Otherwise, the item will start losing its value and worth. As one of my neighbor pointed out, she had her items set up for free and still people wouldn't take anything.

By the time the afternoon came around, traffic became really slow. I was amazed at which items sold and which items didn't. But, all in all, I think that we did a decent job for our first (maybe last!) time trying to sell items. (Key note to selves: try to sell knick-knacks, baby clothes, and furniture next time, as those items were extremely popular).

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What I overheard while I was waiting in line at Marc's:

(An irate woman who was pissed off about something and the manager tried to intervene. The manager walked away and started packing bags at the next cashier):
"Oh, no, you're ok. It's the managers at these stores. They SUCK!"

Gee, tell us what you truly think!]]> Sun, 11 Jun 2006 01:06:00 EDT http://Zuzia.tigblog.org/post/167935 36.3213889 127.419722236.3213889127.4197222